Some rather…interesting things pop up in this chronological list of things in Hogfather. Click this sentence to see the alphabetical list of the same.
Captain Carrot One Man Night Watch – A toy for nice children…?
Improved Manicure Device – Makes one wonder about the original pre-improved version.
Johnson’s Patent “Typhoon” Superior Indoor Ablutorium with Automatic Soap Dish – Devised by Bloody Stupid Johnson. Commissioned by Archchancellor Weatherwax. Tried out by Archchancellor Ridcully. Once.
Hex – Partly magical computer located in the High Energy Magic Building of Unseen University.
Book of Ossory – Part of the Septateuch.
Wow-wow Sauce – A mixture of scumble, pickled cucumbers, capers, mustard, mangoes, figs, grated wahooni, anchovy essence, asafetida, sulphur, and saltpetre. Archchancellor Ridcully’s favorite.
Englebert’s Enhancer – It, well, enhances other things.
Spold’s Unstirring Divisor – A spell that, while able to separate all the nastiness into a beaker, also places the subject into a somewhat larger beaker in a living condition, broadly speaking.
Scumble – An adult beverage made chiefly from apples. The wise drink it a thimbleful at a time.
Burleigh and Stronginthearm (crossbow) – A quality weapon, especially the “made-to-order job with the oiled walnut stock” that Commander Vimes owned.
Bows and Ammo – Periodical subscribed to by Shawn Ogg.
“Three Wizards” Chardonnay – A white wine oft quaffed at UU banquets.
Winkles’ Old Peculiar – A favorite beer of many in Ankh-Morpork.
Woddeley’s Basic Gods – Includes information about lares and penates. Obvz.
Happy Tales – A six-page book owned (and read often) by Banjo Lilywhite.
Offler’s League of Temperance – Violet the Tooth Fairy was a blue-ribbon-wearing member.
Woddeley’s Occult Sequence – A sequence of magical locks. The solution is known to Mr. Sideney and Mr. Teatime, but unfortunately (and surprisingly) not to Mr. Brown.
Twurp’s Peerage – A proper book that Magrat was fed up with the type of. Vimes considered it the guide to the criminal classes.
Spolt’s Forthright Respirator – A spell that can help (even dead?) people breathe again.
